if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
