it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
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