I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
