So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
