is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Randomize
