Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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