That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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