My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
