i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
