Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
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So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
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Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
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