it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize