Texts From Last Night

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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.

  (1-216): View more from Ohio

  It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.

  (216): View more from Ohio

  He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.

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  (216): I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself. (1-216): It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you. (216): He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry. http://tfl.nu/dfyj
  Replies (27) Good night (649) Bad night (5181)
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  (845): View more from New York

  People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk

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  (845): People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk http://tfl.nu/qmhf
  Replies (4) Good night (5686) Bad night (528)
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  (562): View more from California

  he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him

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  (562): he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him http://tfl.nu/6w3v
  Replies (8) Good night (3101) Bad night (864)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that

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  (940): nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that http://tfl.nu/ymub
  Replies (22) Good night (9412) Bad night (1035)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  We stopped her at 12

  (708): View more from Illinois

  12 shots? Or 12 midnight?

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Which answer would freak you out less

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  (630): We stopped her at 12 (708): 12 shots? Or 12 midnight? (630): Which answer would freak you out less http://tfl.nu/edb4
  Replies (5) Good night (5702) Bad night (908)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.

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  (253): Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college. http://tfl.nu/tulo
  Replies (40) Good night (6477) Bad night (1557)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  So....maintenance found the bullethole.....

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  (512): So....maintenance found the bullethole..... http://tfl.nu/54el
  Replies (22) Good night (5367) Bad night (2345)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.

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  (630): We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas. http://tfl.nu/1h9b
  Replies (14) Good night (5973) Bad night (1114)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.

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  (479): Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students. http://tfl.nu/ij14
  Replies (11) Good night (935) Bad night (3147)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.

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  (419): I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done. http://tfl.nu/5j5b
  Replies (6) Good night (1215) Bad night (768)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night

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  (716): just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night http://tfl.nu/yn86
  Replies (11) Good night (3862) Bad night (1273)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.

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  (519): I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore. http://tfl.nu/9p2a
  Replies (4) Good night (1331) Bad night (825)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?

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  (314): Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him? http://tfl.nu/mvm1
  Replies (12) Good night (538) Bad night (382)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.

  (301): View more from Maryland

  You have a very discerning palate.

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  (410): It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze. (301): You have a very discerning palate. http://tfl.nu/r2sj
  Replies (11) Good night (777) Bad night (803)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean

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  (518): I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean http://tfl.nu/nhpo
  Replies (2) Good night (1548) Bad night (325)

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