I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Randomize
