why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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