So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
