Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
