Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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