we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
