matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize