Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
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