I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Randomize
