He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
You can't motorboat a personality
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize