Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
