Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
