There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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