Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
