we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
