my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize