Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
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