He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
