We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Randomize
