I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I feel like death gave me a hand job
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
