We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
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Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize