That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
A+ Viking dick
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