is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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