Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Randomize
