Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize
