Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Don't make out with my wife yet
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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