I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
There's always time for handjobs
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Randomize