wat bout pragnant strippers??
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
