i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
