Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize