idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Randomize