I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
