R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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