So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
