wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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