"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize