the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
