shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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