He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
